(speaking here as khemehli, with help from cela)

so i have been well aware of the tropes that trans girls are very submissive and love to receive puppygirl treatment and so forth (sadly often neglecting the existence of enbies).

but i also have recognized that i am not that submissive, so my thinking is that there are surely others who are like me in this regard.

of course while conjecture is fun and all, i wanted some numbers. my methodology was to figure out if my closer transfemme friends (n=4) would let me leash them. a couple of them (n=2) i have already put on a leash in the past, so that leaves the other two.

for the first friend i was thinking “eh, there is a decent chance my conjecture holds true for her but i’m not too sure” and for the second “xe is definitely going to say no”.

yeah turns out i was entirely wrong and they both just went “oh yeah totally!”. so each time i went ahead and grabbed a leash and collar from my purse, approached them, gently fastened the collar around their neck, and then clipped on the leash. it was really really cute n fun heheh (and no not in a sexual way)

as thanks for their contributions to science, each participant was awarded with a yummy chocolate treat hand fed to them (and headpats and praise).

so moral of the story uhh this is clearly not enough data and i need to ask more transfemmes if i can leash them.

yeah thank you for coming to my TED talk 👍


something else funny of note: when making this post, we first put in the title and accidentally hit post never having actually typed out anything. we deleted it seconds later but its still interesting to see how many upvotes it got despite having ZERO content lol

  • sharkweek@sopuli.xyz
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    5 days ago

    Oh, my sweet summer child. Being proud of being ignorant is not a great way to go through life.

    It’s ok that you’re vanilla, it’s nothing to be ashamed of

    • Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      It’s not ignorance. I’ve done a bunch of less vanilla stuff (probably a greater variety of things than most people) It just doesn’t interest me. I find it distracting and performative.

      “Oh my god I’m so hot for you!”

      “Wait a minute while I fetch 25 m of rope and check which of the toys are charged. Do you remember where I put the violet wand?”

      “I think it’s in the drawer with the butt plugs”

      15 minutes later your all set up and about to actually begin, and your youngest child wakes up because of all the noise you made setting up the st Andrews cross and starts banging on your door. It’s the only banging that’s happening that night.

      Alternatively you don’t allow a cool down time while you get ready and just start eating her like a fat kid at an all you can eat cake buffet until she is reduced to a quivering mess unable to move and you both pass out from exhaustion in the wet patch. You can also just pick up where you left off any time during the night whenever one of you regains consciousness.

          • sharkweek@sopuli.xyz
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            3 days ago

            That kinky people also do what you’ve described. It’s not like we’re one dimensional characters only capable of doing one thing.

            Meanwhile, you appear to believe that kink is all about achieving an orgasm as quickly as possible. As if intimate contact is a race, and something to get out of the way

            • Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world
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              3 days ago

              Not even close. My partner and I spend several hours on it if we have the time. But you seem to believe that you have to stop after the first orgasm or that a person can’t be held in an orgasm for 20-30 minutes. I’m not talking about a five minute shag and then rolling over and going to sleep.

              • sharkweek@sopuli.xyz
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                3 days ago

                Then why have you said that what you want to do is quicker and easier than anything kinky?

                Given how much of kink is given over to edging and prolonging sex (never mind the particular kink of being forced to have more and longer orgasms than is pleasurable), you’re again showing your ignorance

                • Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world
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                  2 days ago

                  I’ve never said it’s the case for everyone. I’ve always said this was my preference. Not everyone likes kinky stuff. If we’re going with the flavour analogy then if normal sex is vanilla, then what you’re talking about is liquorice. Plenty of people love liquorice but just as many fucking hate it.

                  I’ve tried it, it’s fine, but I’m not going to go ahead and buy a whole bag of liquorice candy because for my personal tastes, it isn’t that great. You keep calling me ignorant for having a personal opinion about something I have experience in. Why? Why is it ignorant to say “I have tried a thing and based on my experience of it, I don’t like it”?

                  It’s fine if you like it. I’m not offended by other people liking it, I just don’t like it myself. But don’t go saying that everyone likes kinky stuff, because genuinely most people tolerate it for the benefit of a partner or like it occasionally for a bit of variety. I will tolerate it. I just don’t want it. Just like I eat liquorice if it’s offered to me.

                  If you want examples: I’ve had several partners who like to be tied/chained up, flogged, and one who liked me to cut her with a ceremonial dagger and drink her blood. It was all a mood killer for me. I also have absolutely no interest in having these things done to me. Its not ignorance, so stop saying that. You clearly don’t understand what the word ignorance actually means.

                  If you offer someone a bacon sandwich and they say “no thanks I don’t like meat” do you say " omg shut up you’re so ignorant!"? What is your actual problem?

                  • sharkweek@sopuli.xyz
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                    2 days ago

                    You commented on a thread specifically about kinky stuff, in order to say you don’t like kinky stuff.

                    Then you said a bunch of things about kink that show a complete lack of both understanding and respect for others.

                    And it’s my fault, apparently?

                    Normally I’d say you need to take the stick out of your arse, but in this context maybe you would benefit from having something inserted instead.